Thoughts

Since the accident, I've been rethinking all that we took for granted; among these things is the concept of heavenly justice. Justice, as we all believe, is repaying each person for their deeds, karma, "what goes around comes around". Well, I discovered that this is not the concept of heavenly justice, at least not on earth. "No good deed shall go unpunished", true, unless that good deed is done with evil intentions or pretentiously, then it will be rewarded, at least on earth. Heavenly justice, as I have come to see it, is giving every one the same lump sum, but not the same components, so, if you are given a really good soul, you'll be given an extremely miserable external life, but still the good soul inside you will comfort u, and if you are given an evil soul, your external life will be dandy, after all u sold your mother to get it, but you'll always stay hungry for more, nothing will satisfy you, cause the void inside you that used to be your soul is a bottomless pit, and the mediocre people have mediocre lives. That's one theory, how else can we explain that real nice people meet the worst circumstances ever?! Another theory, is that most people are like herds, so that any evil gesture from an evil character makes them stay away and obey, that's how evil gets stronger all the time, cause most people don't fight it, so evil grows stronger and makes life a living hell for the good ones who do. I think that if we fight evil, even the gods who rule us will change. I have reached a point where the idea of a single male god is completely unconvincing to me. I think it's the same way in heaven as it is on earth; the ones who refuse to fight dirty seldom become the ones in charge. We cannot deny the idea that some people are born evil, the idea that all people are born as pure souls is something I'm not completely sure of though I cannot contradict at the sight of a baby or an infant. I only wish that if there is no heaven after death, there will be no hell as well, just a peaceful eternal nothingness.